Yugi Kong
by Noodle Mutoh
Summary: A remake of King Kong, Yu-Gi-Oh style! Please review!


disclaimer: I own Yugioh and all of it's merchendise, so back away!!!.....ehh...no I don't really...  
  
*sobs* WHY!? I WANT ALL THE MONEY!!! AND I WANT SOMEONE TO MAKE ME A YUGI   
  
PLUSHIE!!! WAAHHHHHHH!!!  
  
Yugi: She scary.  
  
Jou: Eep! I want my mommy!  
  
Kaiba: Oh shut up you lousy poodle.  
  
Jou: HEY!!  
  
Noodle(meh!!): *hits Kaiba with giant string bean of DOOM!* Don't call the Jou-man a poodle!!  
  
Kaiba: *crying* s-s-sorry....  
  
Noodle: That's right. Fear me mortal!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!  
  
Jou: Can we get to the fic now?  
  
noodle: *sicks Majin Bulma Ryoko Masaki on Jou* GLOMP ATTACK!  
  
MBRM: *glomps Jou*  
  
Jou: AHHHHH!!! Get off meh you freak!!!   
  
YUGI KONG  
  
(no giant monkey Yugi's were hurt in the making of this fic)  
  
One day, Seto Kaiba, Jonouchi, Honda, and Anzu went on a picnic in the Japanese Jungle.  
  
(pretent there is one) But something was wrong in the jungle....something....precious....  
  
Anzu: OH BOY I'M STARVING! I CAN"T WAAAAAIIIIIIIIT TO EAT THIS TURKEY!!!  
  
Kaiba: Oh shut up, everyone hates you.  
  
Honda: Now now Kaiba. She's eating for two now you know.  
  
Kaiba: WHAT!? YOU'RE A DADDY!  
  
Anzu: No, idiot! I would never do it with that moron!  
  
Kaiba: Then who is it??  
  
Anzu: Pegasus.  
  
Kaiba: THAT FRUIT CAKE!???!?!?!?!? WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO IT WITH HIM!?!?!  
  
Anzu: He offered me turkey! *drools* muahahahahaha.  
  
Jou: Weirdo...  
  
Just then, as Jou spoke his words, something russtled in the bushes.  
  
Honda: d-d-d-did you g-guys hear that?!  
  
Kaiba: Hear what?  
  
Bakura:*jumps out of bushes wearing a grass skirt and holdinga spear* Me that's what!! MWAHAHAHA!   
  
Anzu: WOW! it's the rare white-headed turkey creature!  
  
Bakura: *pokes Anzu with spear* No, I am a native of the jungle. Now, let me take you to our king.  
  
All(minus Bakura): Ok.  
  
~*~*~*~So the gang heads to the village to meet the king..~*~*~*  
  
bakura: Now I'll take you.*grabs Anzu* You are nice and plump! The king will like you!  
  
Jou: Wah? The king likes sluts??  
  
Malik:*pops ot of nowhere...also a native to the jungle* No, STUPID MORTAL!! Every year,   
  
our king eats a villager from our village, but this year he will eat someone from Domino City!!  
  
Anzu: Sounds good.  
  
*Malik and Bakura tie Anzu to a post. Then the ground starts rumbling..*  
  
Malik: Hear comes the king!!  
  
Anzu: YAY! THE TURKEY KING!!  
  
*A giant Yugi emerges from the trees*  
  
Yugi: Hiya guys!  
  
Bakura: You idiot!!In this story you are a giant Yugi-Ape! You can't speak!!  
  
Yugi: Oh. eh, oohh ohh ahhahh!!  
  
*the giant Yugi takes Anzu to his secret cave deep in the jungle*  
  
Jou:*sarcastically* Oh no! she be gone!!  
  
Honda: Let's partay!!!  
  
~*~*~*The gang parties all night but they end up getting drunk and wondering into Yugi Kong's  
  
cave~*~*~*~*  
  
Jou: Whhhooooaaaaa *hic* I'm in da ocean!   
  
Kaiba: It'sssss aaa cavve sssstupid chiwawawawawaaaaa...!  
  
Honda: I like to warble zooble zouss too.  
  
~*~*~*Then came a cry for help~*~*~*~*  
  
Anzu:*from a very high ledge* OH MY GOD GUYS! SAVE ME!! YUGI-KONG IS TREATING ME LIKE A GODDESS!! SAVE MEEEE!  
  
*pauses*...NO WAIT! NEVERMIND!! DON'T SAVE ME!! I KINDA LIKE THIS!!  
  
Jou: Damnit! I thought we gots rid o her dumb ass!!  
  
Honda: Yeah. Sniffle heimer!  
  
Kaiba: ...guesssss weee'lll haavvve tooo savvvve herrr...*hic*  
  
Anzu: NO YOU RETARD! DON'T CLIMB UP HERE!!!  
  
Kaiba: *starts climbing*  
  
Anzu: STAY DOWN THERE!!!!  
  
*Then the sound of walking was heard*  
  
Anzu: Oh no! Yugi Kong is coming!! Hide you guys!  
  
yugi kong: ohhh ahhheee eee! ^-^  
  
Anzu: No too late!!  
  
yugi Kong: Eh?  
  
Jou: Yo! We be herr to get da slut back, yo! I challenge you!!  
  
Yugi Kong: Eyyyaaaahh!!!  
  
::BATTLE MODE ON::  
  
Jou: I'll use my 'super donkey mega phat loud big small left right dude kick attack!!'  
  
Y.K.: ...  
  
Jou: HIIYAAAAAAAAAA! *leaps at Yugi Kong*  
  
Y.K.:*Flattens him with his giant hands*  
  
Jou: I pity the foooo....  
  
Anzu: NOO! JOOOUUU!!!!  
  
kaiba: Shhhhhit! I'll jusssst usssse my 'Instant Giant Iron Cage' to handle this!  
  
*iron cage opens and traps Yugi kong*  
  
Y.K.: OOOWAAAAAA! OOOOOWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!  
  
Kaiba: now we'llllll taaaake him to TokyoooO!!  
  
~*~**~*~y.K. is airlifted to Tokyo and shown to the people of the city~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Man 1: WOW! Look at that giant ape thingy!  
  
Man 2: Yeah! i wonder if he's married!?!?  
  
man 1: O_o(WTF???)  
  
*people of Tokyo snap pictues of Yugi Kong*  
  
Y.K.: Hell no. I hate pictures. I think I might go crazy and terrorize the city.  
  
noodle(meh)the authress: Yugi!! You're not allowed to talk!!  
  
Y.K.: Shut the *bleep* up you *bleepin* *bleeeep*  
  
Noodle: What the hell!? Stop PMS-ing!!  
  
Y.K.: I do not get P.M.S! now you've angered me to the point where I will break the cage.  
  
roar.*breaks cage* Now die ruthless world.*terrorizes city then climbs up a building. Looks  
  
in window #1*  
  
jou:*in shower singing 'One Card Short'* I'm always one card short, always one day late,for once I'd like an ending I can celebrate! I stacked the deck myself, so there's no one else to blame!I need just one more move...one final chance to prove...I CAN WIN THIS GAME!!!  
  
*Looks out the window at Yugi Kong* WTF!!!  
  
Y.K.: That song is gay man.   
  
Jou: Sh-shut up! *sobs*  
  
Y.K.: *limbs higher. Peers into window #2*  
  
Yami Malik: *dancing* Oh baby baby! How was I supposed to know, that sometin wasn't right--  
  
*stops and stares at Yugi Kong, who is taping with a camera*  
  
Y.K.: 20 bucks or I'll tell the whole world.   
  
Y. Malik: Deal.  
  
*Yugi Kong proceeds up the building till he sees Anzu in the window*  
  
Anzu: Yugi Kong! I want to tell you...I LOVE YOU!!!!  
  
Y.K.: I been lookin for you, bitch! I was supposed to nail you an hour ago, stupid ho!!  
  
Where you been, BITCH!?!?  
  
Anzu: uhh...  
  
Man #2: She's been with me, Yugi-boy!!  
  
Y.K.: No! It can't be!!! PEAGASUS!?!?!  
  
Man#2/Pegasus: That's right! And now you're precious Anzu has my baby!  
  
Y.K.: hOW DARE YOU STEAL MY BITCH...YOU BITCH!!!  
  
Pegasus: Grr! I'm going to take you're soul!  
  
Y.K.: *smooshes him with thumb*  
  
Anzu: NOOO! He LOVED YOU! CAN'Y YOU SEE!??  
  
y.K.:I'm lost. eh, whteva! ome with me Bitch!!!*grabs Anzu*  
  
Anzu: AAHHHHHHHH!!AHHHHHHH!!  
  
Y.K.:*climbs to the top of the building and shakes Anzu around* OOhh OOhhh AHHHHHH!!  
  
Anzu: HEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLPPP!!  
  
Y.K.: Shut up, BITcH!  
  
*Then helicoptors armed with guns start Shooting at Yugi Kong*  
  
Y.K.: Damnit!! I'll Use Bitch as a shield!!! *Holds Bi-...er..Anzu out in font of him*  
  
Anzu: *being pelted with bullets* AAHHHHHHHH!!  
  
Y.K.:Damnit! She's still alive!!  
  
Anzu: You'll pay Yugi kong..!  
  
Y.K.: Shut up bitch. *drops her 100 stories*  
  
Anzu:AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhh....SPLAT!  
  
Y.K.: HEY BITCH!! ARE YOU DEAD DOWN THERE!?!???  
  
Anzu: You'll pay.....  
  
Y.K.: DAMNIT!! DIE ALREADY!!!  
  
Helicopters: Let us take care of this. *Launch missiles at Anzu*  
  
Anzu: NOOOOOOOOOO!!! YOU'LL ALL PAAAYYYY! BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!  
  
All: YAY!  
  
And so...our heroes have a party and get drunk in celebration for the bitch's death..  
  
..but a second before she died, she had the baby....the baby narrowly escaped the blast but survived....this baby, coming from Pegasus, was a mutant of course, and swore revenge on Yugi Kong. What will be in store for our heroes?? What will await them in the sequal!?!?  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Noodle:How do ya like it?? It's my first try, so don't be TOOOOO hard on   
  
me!!  
  
Kaiba: Face it, this sucks.  
  
Noodle: Shut your mouth mortal!  
  
Kaiba: Yes ma'am!!!  
  
Noodle: ^-^  
  
Yugi: I'm scared!  
  
bakura: Me too!  
  
Noodle: Don't worry boys! I LOVE you!!*glomps them both*  
  
Yugi&Bakura: Help us Jou!!  
  
Jou: sorry guys! hehehe. *Majin Bulma jumps out of nowhere and glomps him* EEEP!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Review PLEASE!! 


End file.
